A wonderful sentence from Shelby Foote

"Steedman, who was 47, Pennsylvania born, a former printer, Texas revolutionist, and Ohio legislator, a great hearty man, broad breasted and broad shouldered, whose face, according to an admirer, was written all over with sturdy sense and stout courage, brought them up on the double and committed them with no more delay other than it took to tell a staff officer to see that his name was spelled correctly in the obituaries."

A single sentence.

The deliberate and slow manner of Foote's writing is wonderful. Here, he's describing a particular point in the Battle of Chickamauga, where Steedman essentially rallies the Federal troops in a valiant counter-attack.

"We Must Declare War Upon War"

Said President Obama at the UN, today. That's an actual quote. He actually said that. Really.

My reaction to declaring "war on war".

First of all, that's just a weird construction. War on war? Huh? That sounds like something out of Dr. Strangelove.

As to the substance, it's a naive and silly idea to try and declare war on war because you're never going to win the War on War.

There are always going to be aggressive nations/groups who ultimately decide to use force of arms against others. This will always be the case. To try and "end war" is like trying to "end sadness". It ain't gonna happen.

The problem is that in almost all things, President Obama sees the world as he wants to see it, and not how it actually is.

The Greatest Orator of Our Time Is A Third-Grader

Barack Obama: he's the greatest orator of our time. Sure, there's Pericles; he was good. Yeah, JFK had some good lines, and fine...FDR could turn a phrase.

But Obama is the best we have right now. Serious, you guys.

The president paid a visit to Zingerman's Deli in Ann Arbor, Mich., today as part of his push to increase the minimum wage. Zingerman's he said pays it's employees "fair wages". Whether their fair enough to afford the lunch the president had isn't clear. He ordered a small Rueben for $1399; larges go for nearly $17...

"If they tried to sell [Paul Ryan's budget] at Zingerman's they have to call it the 'stinkburger' or the 'meanwhich,'" he said.

Yep, that's the state of play we have from the president of the United States. He's decided to go with the ol' "stinkburger" and "meanwhich" argument. This form of argument is most effective on the third-grade level. If memory serves, I believe that if the "stinkburger" argument is not effective at changing your opponent's mind, the next level up is to call them a "Poo-poo head". Or Dummy. I'm not sure which.

Which dovetails into a related question I have. What is the most memorable line from President Obama? What's his great, soaring line that speaks to all Americans? I can't really think of anything memorable.

My Dialect Map - I Can't Name the Area Between the Sidewalk and the Road

You see that picture? I have no idea what to call the grass between the road and the sidewalk.

You've probably already taken this quiz from the New York Times. It's exploded across the internet faster than knife fight in a phone booth. Likely, it's gone viral because people love to talk about how they talk.

I don't normally take quizzes (online or otherwise) but since I had plenty of time this Christmas Day, I decided to go for it. It actually doesn't take very long and it pegs you pretty close to where you live. (At least it did for me and Mrs. Permanent Press). I can't show you my map because it's not linkable for some reason. Take my word for it, it's pretty accurate for someone who lives in Columbia, has a father from Augusta, GA and went to college in the Shenandoah valley of Virginia.

To me, the most interesting question was "What do you call the grass strip between the sidewalk and the road?". It just blew my mind. It's so common and everyday, but I've never given that a second thought and I don't have a word for it.  It's not like some weird thing that only exists in Norway.

Anyone got a word for that?

Anyway, I used to think that I had no accent at all, but that changed when I went to Northwestern Indiana for law school. Most of my classmates were from the midwest or the upper midwest. I certainly didn't sound like them. I'd be interested to see their maps. Maybe they have a word for what the grass between the sidewalk and the road is.

Access Does Not Mean Free

Apparently, Governor Haley vetoed some spending. Among the spending she vetoed was spending for the SC Arts Commission.

Of course, the folks who like to spend our tax money were quick to criticize:

“It is disappointing that she would put a target on the Arts Commission and the Sea Grants Consortium,” he said. “It’s been proven over and over that having access to the arts helps attract industry to South Carolina... [House Minority Leader Harry Ott]

Read more here: http://www.thestate.com/2012/07/07/2344499/haley-issues-budget-vetoes.html#storylink=omni_popular#storylink=cpy

Having access to the arts? What the hell is he talking about?

I'm so tired of people using the word "access" incorrectly. Access is the freedom or ability to make use of something. It doesn't mean that you get to force someone to pay for it. I have the "access" to purchase a handgun, but the State of South Carolina isn't denying me access just because they won't buy me a sweet Colt Gold Cup.

Stop saying "access" when you mean subsidy. The Planned Parenthood crowd always talks about "access" to birth-control. Everyone has access to birth-control, you idiots. Most of us just buy it, and don't expect it for free.

Everyone has access to the arts. Art is all around you. I'm sure that the SC Arts Commission really thinks what they are doing is a good thing. I'm sure they have good intentions. But stop saying that people don't have "access" to things, when what you really mean is I want this thing for free.

Just say what you mean. And quit acting so damn entitled to my tax money. It's not a god-given right to have a stupid arts commission, and it's certainly not a core function of our state government.

Read more here: http://www.thestate.com/2012/07/07/2344499/haley-issues-budget-vetoes.html#storylink=omni_popular#storylink=cpy

Read more here: http://www.thestate.com/2012/07/09/2347583/arts-groups-plan-rally-against.html#storylink=cpy

Do You Need to "Tame" Your Southern Accent?

An Auburn graduate (of all people) can help you smooth out the rough edges of your southern accent.

I guess there are some Southerners who are taunted by non-Southerners, and that makes them want to try and eliminate what they perceive to be a flaw. I guess I'm just more self-confident (or maybe I don't venture out of Columbia much) but I wouldn't try to change my accent for anything. Being Southern means that we are warm, welcoming, and our accents reflect that.

If your Yankee boss doesn't like it, then you can impress him with your actual skill and knowledge. Also, if you're a Southerner in an office full of non-Southerners, they're probably jealous that your accent makes you unique.

Don't let the bastards get you down.