Why Brian Williams Lied About His Combat Experience

"Every man thinks meanly of himself for not having been a soldier, or not having been at sea."

Samuel Johnson said that. By the way, h/t to Ace for bringing that quote to mind.

By now, we all know that Brian Williams lied about being in a helicopter that was shot down during the Iraq war. Here's a video of Williams lying about the event, in detail, to David Letterman. I have been thinking about why he lied about this event. People defending Williams have tossed out this "memory is complicated" idea, in an attempt to let him off the hook. For instance, people are saying things like:

"He was in the helicopter in the sense that we are all in the helicopter. We are the ones who misremember. Misremember, conflate."

What? We are all in the helicopter? What is that even supposed to mean? Memory isn't complicated. You're either in a helicopter that was shot down, or you were in another helicopter an hour behind. It's not that complicated. Next time you get caught in a lie, try out the ol' "memory is complicated" line and let me know how that goes for you.

Look, people. sometimes, the simplest answer is the right answer. Here, I think the simple answer is correct: Brian Williams wanted to portray himself as as badass. So he made up a story.

Williams has been a journalist - a news reader - for his entire career. He's never been a soldier. He's never been one of the rough men standing ready in the night to visit violence upon people. However, he's reported on them, so he's been around them a lot.

I can relate to this. I'm a lawyer, but that makes me kind of the odd-ball in my family and extended family. Every single adult male in my family before me was in the military, and was deployed overseas to combat. Everyone.

My dad was in the Army as a doctor in an 93rd Evac Unit in the first Gulf war. My uncle was in the Army and was a tank commander in the first Gulf war, in addition to other deployments. My other uncle flew helicopters in Vietnam. My late grandfather was special forces in WWII, fighting at Anzio, among other places. My brother in law flew helicopters in the second gulf war. I can keep going back to the Civil War, but I think you get the idea.

Me? I'm just a lawyer. I'm not saying that anyone makes me feel bad about it (they don't), but sometimes I feel guilty about it on my own. Yeah, I know that being a lawyer is an honorable profession, and it's kind of interesting, but it's not exactly the same thing as being deployed to a combat area. I'm kind of the opposite of Lt. Dan.

So I'm kind of in the same boat as Williams. We're both guys who have been around military guys to a great extent, but we're not in the club. We're never going to be in the club. We don't have the bond that those men have, and we're never going to have it. Not that there's anything wrong with being a lawyer or a news reader; both are perfectly legitimate careers.

Here's what happened. I think Williams did a lot of reporting on military issues, and he got to know military men. I think he truly admires them. I think Williams admired these military men that he was around so much, he wanted to be part of their group so badly, that he made up this story so he could fit in - so he could be one of the guys. Who doesn't want to be one of the guys?

Essentially, I think Brian Williams lied for one of the oldest and most common reasons of all: He lied so people would think he's cool. I think deep down, he felt uncool standing next to these military men. Their actions held up a mirror to him, and he looked at his own job of reading the news and felt like he didn't measure up.

He certainly doesn't measure up now. Those who are dishonorable certainly aren't part of the club.

BREAKING: Lying Politicians Lie

The Democratic Senate Report on CIA's methods is just politicians lying about what they knew, what they authorized, and what everyone wanted in the aftermath of 9/11.

CIA didn't conduct this program on some kind of wild notion - they didn't just make this up because they were bored.

CIA did this at the specific request of the American people's elected representatives in Congress and the White House. The Department of Justice was kept in the loop on the program and issued legal opinions on it. Congress was repeatedly briefed. CIA did all this...because we asked them to.

And now, these same spineless politicians want to squirm out of the fact that they asked CIA to these things.

It makes me sick.

Pardon me, but these politicians are lying sacks of shit. CIA does difficult stuff. The easy stuff gets handed off to other agencies. We asked CIA officers to do things, and now we're throwing them under the bus? Well, good luck getting CIA officers to go do anything remotely controversial in defense of the country in the future.

Animal Rights Group Paid Witness To Lie At Trial - Loses Big TIme

$15.75 million will buy a lot of peanuts

Hey y'all: don't pay your witnesses to make things up. That's bad. How bad?

For starters, once it comes to light you'll lose the case. But it doesn't end there. The person you wrongfully sued will like be upset. How upset? Well, the'll probably sue you.

A settlement reached between animal rights groups and the producers of the Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus serves as a cautionary tale about the consequences of making an allegation in federal court that you have trouble backing up.

The Humane Society of the United States and other animal-rights groups have paid Feld Entertainment a combined $15.75 million to settle allegations by the company that the groups and their lawyers bribed a former circus employee to make up allegations that Feld abused Asian elephants in its circus.

So to recap: The Humane Society lost the original case and had to pay Ringling Bros. attorneys' fees for just that case. Then, Ringling Bros. sued The Humane Society for the whole "paying the witness to lie" thing, which just cost The Humane Society and some other related animal rights groups a total of $15.75 million.

Next time someone from PETA or The Humane Society asks you for money, you can just tell them No thanks bro, I've already given some money to Ringling Bros.

LA Times Says Obamacare is Unfair to Young Middle Class

Looks like the urban, youngish, middle-class folks who were singing Obama's praises have found out that they are the rubes.

Lot of that going around now. If you're under 40 and you voted for Obama because of Obamacare, thinking it was going to help you out in some way...you're in for a little surprise. Here's how the Animal White House is explaining the fact that they lied to you:

President Otter. Trick or treat, indeed. Happy Halloween.

What You Learn as President (Or Kindergarten)

So, our President had a press conference the other day. Among other things, he said this:

“The truth of the matter is you can't just make stuff up. That’s one thing you learn as president of the United States. You get called in to account."

To use a phrase that our President is fond of: let's be clear - he means lying when he says "make stuff up".

Not for nothing, but most of us learn not to lie much earlier in life. Also, not to get to philosophical on this riff, but the fear of getting found out on your lies isn't supposed to be the motivation not to lie. You're not supposed to lie (make stuff up) because...oh yeah...it's morally wrong.

It's like saying: The truth of the matter is that you don't take things that aren't yours. That's one thing you learn as president of the United States. Oh, and washing your hands before you eat, that's a biggie, too".

Zimmerman's Bond Revoked

This is why you don't lie to Judges.