Senator Schumer Tackles Serious Problem: Grill Brushes

So, let's say you're a United States Senator. Maybe you're from the great state of New York. The economy is stagnant, unemployment is high, the US doesn't have a budget, and Europe is imploding. What important topic should you address first?

Metal Grill Brushes! The horror!

Beware!

No, it's true. United States Senator Chuck Schumer (D-NY) has called on the Consumer Product Safety Commission and the Food and Drug Administration (you know, the Federal Government) to let us know whether metal grill brushes are safe for consumer use after reports that some guy in New Jersey swallowed some metal bristles that came off his grill brush. Senator Schumer's actual letter is here.

Ok, at what point is it the responsibility of an individual to look at what they are doing? I grill all the time, and I use a metal brush to clean the grill every single time. It's not like we're building a rocket here; it's just scraping a metal grill with a metal brush. That's it. But here's my secret: Use your eyeballs to look at what you are doing. If you see your grill brush falling apart as you scrape back and forth on the  grill...umm...it's time to get a new brush.

Oh, and don't eat the metal bristles.

Seriously, if you aren't paying enough attention to your grill brush, you don't have any business operating something as dangerous as a grill. You're not ready for fire yet. Go back to the microwave.

Schumer said men from New Jersey and Washington State were recently hospitalized after swallowing metal bristles that fell off their grill brushes. He said that reports indicate that similar incidents occurred nearly a dozen times over the last three years.

Nearly a dozen times in three years! I've done some math, and that amounts to nearly four people per year. I bet there are more people killed in one year alone by vending machines falling on them because they're shaking the machine trying to get their Funyons to fall off the clip. While we're at it, we should probably have some sort of warning not to touch the grill...because damn, that thing is hot. Someone could get hurt.

At the end of this federal investigation, I'm sure we'll have some awesome warning labels on grill brushes, if Schumer even allows us to still use them.

Metal grill brushes - don't eat them.