Only 500 Days Until "Climate Chaos"

To continue on the whole global warming topic today, I guess I should cancel the awesome party I was planning on throwing 501 days from now.

There is no week without a phone call or a visit between John and myself, and we have on the agenda many items, many issues – Iran, because negotiations are resuming today; the question of Syria, and we shall meet next Thursday in London together; Ukraine as well; and very important issues, issue of climate change, climate chaos. And we have – as I said, we have 500 days to avoid climate chaos. And I know that President Obama and John Kerry himself are committed on this subject and I’m sure that with them, with a lot of other friends, we shall be able to reach success on this very important matter.

The thing this French guy needs to learn from psychics and horoscopes is to keep your predictions vague. Being specific never works out. You need to say things that can't be distinctly proven wrong.

500 days seems kind of specific.

My favorite part of the piece is that the only commentary in the piece is "France is scheduled to host the "21st Conference of the Parties on Climate Change" in December 2015, about 565 days from now".

Seems like they should just cancel that whole shin-dig, amirite?

No Hurricanes for SC This Year?

Hurricane Irene Via NASA

According to scientists at Coastal Carolina University, we won't have any hurricanes hit the Palmetto State this summer.

But wait! I was told that global warming would increase hurricane activity. How can this be?

"95% of models overestimated actual temperatures"

According to a chart of actual satellite and surface temperature observations (reality) vs. what was predicted by ninety different climate models, 95 percent of models overestimated actual temperatures. 95%!

Nothing says Science™ like predicting stuff incorrectly over and over and over again. Hey, the science is settled! Don't look at our failed climate models!

Headlines for Tuesday May 6, 2014

Today is Tuesday, May 06, 2014. On this day, back in 1937 the German airship Hindenburg caught on fire and burned. There were thirty-five fatalities including one ground crewman. This widely known disaster (along with the passenger airplane) ended the era of the airships for passenger travel. It also provided a the basis of a metaphor for something being a spectacular failure.

1. South Carolina Rep. Trey Gowdy will lead the House Select Committee on Benghazi. Not a bad choice. Gowdy has been known for his tough questioning of witnesses in front of his committee before. Rather than give a speech, he tends to...you know...ask questions. We'll see what he makes of this opportunity.

2. First it was Global Warming. Then it was Climate Change. Now it's Climate Disruption. Please adjust your lexicons accordingly. They can call it whatever they want, it's still silly.

3. Healthy SC man defrauds Veterans Administration by claiming he had combat wounds. They really ought to have a severe punishment for this kind of thing.

That's all I've got for you this morning. I'm heading to Florence.

Coldest March In Over 20 Years?

AL GORE, CALL YOUR OFFICE: Obviously, record cold temperatures are directly caused by humans, or something.

Eastern Europe Is Begging for Help

The Eastern European countries are begging for help from the USA.

European officials who want to reduce their dependency on Russian gas also have seized on the situation to mount a major lobbying campaign in Washington for new legislation to ease regulations on American LNG exports. Some of these countries, including Bulgaria, Sweden and the Baltic states, rely on Russia for 100 percent of their gas supplies, and Moscow has shown repeatedly it is willing to crimp supplies for leverage in political disputes.

We have the ability to help Eastern Europe be less dependent on Russia. This is what the USA is good at. We could out produce them, sell Eastern Europe all the fuel they could pay for. It would increase our exports, help our allies, and diminish Russia's influence. Will we do so?

Given the track record of our current President, it seems unlikely we will make this move.

Michael Crichton on Environmentalism as Religion

Last night the Senate Democrats had an all night talkathon in which they burned the midnight oil to discuss climate change. (See what I did there?)

In response, I'd like to share a piece that author Michael Crichton wrote in the Hawaii Free Press several years ago. It holds up very well today.

I studied anthropology in college, and one of the things I learned was that certain human social structures always reappear. They can't be eliminated from society. One of those structures is religion. Today it is said we live in a secular society in which many people---the best people, the most enlightened people---do not believe in any religion. But I think that you cannot eliminate religion from the psyche of mankind. If you suppress it in one form, it merely re-emerges in another form. You can not believe in God, but you still have to believe in something that gives meaning to your life, and shapes your sense of the world. Such a belief is religious. 

Today, one of the most powerful religions in the Western World is environmentalism. Environmentalism seems to be the religion of choice for urban atheists. Why do I say it's a religion? Well, just look at the beliefs. If you look carefully, you see that environmentalism is in fact a perfect 21st century remapping of traditional Judeo-Christian beliefs and myths. 

There's an initial Eden, a paradise, a state of grace and unity with nature, there's a fall from grace into a state of pollution as a result of eating from the tree of knowledge, and as a result of our actions there is a judgment day coming for us all. We are all energy sinners, doomed to die, unless we seek salvation, which is now called sustainability. Sustainability is salvation in the church of the environment. Just as organic food is its communion, that pesticide-free wafer that the right people with the right beliefs, imbibe.

Go read the whole thing.

The Well-Regulated Militia, Chuck Norris, and Global Warming

Happy Monday.

Glenn Reynolds (a/k/a Instapundit) has an interesting essay on the origins and decline of the militia.

Also, it's Chuck Norris' birthday today, so you better watch yourself. I kind of just figured that Chuck Norris was the militia.

To recap the weekend, USC Baseball swept Brown University to improve to 15-0 on the year. We'll see how the team handles their first SEC games this weekend when the Gamecocks play host to Ole Miss for three games. My guess is that the Gamecocks take two out of three.

In the category of things that will make you dumber for having listened to, Senate Democrats are going to hold an all night "talkathon" on Global Warming darn, I mean Climate Change.

I just don't get the Climate Change people. The earth has been warming up and cooling down in cycles for millions of years. It's just nature. Man probably cannot affect the natural warming and cooling cycles of the entire planet, and it's just folly to say that this temperature, right now, is somehow inherently the "perfect temperature" for the planet.

Anyway, that's enough for now. Everyone go to work.

Enjoy Your Snow Day -Snow Related Links

Enjoy your snow day, y'all. Here are some interesting snow-related links for you to kill some time with while you're holed up.

1. Canadian Ski Coach Helps Russian Skier in Awesome Sportsmanlike Fashion. In case you forgot what the Olympics was all about.

2. How Much Snow It Takes to Close School Where You Live. A handy map for you school-age kids.

3. 95% of the Global Warming Models Are Wrong. No kidding, huh?

Today's snowy post brought to you by redheads with guns in the snow.

You know nothing, Jon Snow.

That's all I got for today. See you after the snow melts.

You've Lost Another Ship?

Remember the ship full of global warming scientists who are stuck in the Antarctic ice? Yeah, the ship is still suck, but that's not why I'm updating you.

You've lost another ship?

I'm updating you because a second ship (sent to rescue them) is stuck. So at this point, the score is:

Massive Anarctic Ice Sheet: 2

Scientists: 0

At some point we need to talk to these supposedly smart people who keep getting stuck in the ice. I'm not being filled with confidence that these are our best and brightest. This is comedy gold. I'm sure even the penguins are laughing at these idiots.

You know what's even funnier? When Al Gore got a Nobel Prize in 2007, he said in his Nobel acceptance speech that the arctic would be ice free in 2013. Oh well, at least I have a new theme song for the global warming dopes:

Check out the hook while my DJ revolves it.

Scientists Trapped by Antarctic Sea Ice

Some scientists pushing the global warming climate change theory went on an expedition to the Antarctic to measure the decline of sea ice due to global warming. Guess what happened?

They got stuck in the record levels of sea ice.

The irony here is thick. How thick exactly? About 3 meters thick. The ice is so thick that not even a Russian icebreaker can rescue them, so it looks like they may need to be airlifted out of there.

FYI, it's summer time in the Antarctic. Good thing they didn't go in the winter, amirite?

I'm not a scientist, but it sounds like there is plenty of ice to go around.

Break's Over; Back to Work

Ok, y'all, everyone back to work. Break's over. So what's going on in the world today?

1. Did healthcare.gov get fixed over the weekend? Well, sort of. If you define "fixed" as a website that still doesn't really work all the time. It's kind of like Sex Panther Cologne. But hey, for the people who don't have to use the website because they're either exempt or already have insurance, the site works perfectly.

2. Abandoned Sites That Would Make Great Super Villain Lairs. In other news, if you have that hard to shop for person on your Christmas list, here are a list of six abandoned sites that would make great super-villain lairs.

3. Speaking of Super Villains, our "strong mayor" referendum is going to be on Tuesday. Here's everything you need to know, courtesy of The State. Funny, I don't see anything about the mayor getting a cool lair. That seems like a requirement, right?

In all seriousness, I don't have too strong of a position on the "strong mayor" thing. If you elect good people to office, they'll mostly do a good job. If you elect corrupt goobers to office, you'll have a poorly run city. Maybe it's easier to find one good person than it is to find a whole council of them. Who knows? All I know is that I doubt this will solve any of Columbia's problems.

4. Global Cooling Returns! The arctic ice cap grew 29% from 2012. Here's a picture:

Al Gore, call your office.

Monday Headlines 9-30-13

Don't have time for a long commentary-type post, but here are some events that I'm seeing around the midlands and the country:

1. Columbia City Hall renovations are finished, but a little more expensive that originally intended. They originally budgeted $500,000, but ended up spending over twice that: $1,113,411 as of late last week. Bryan's status: not surprised.
2. Gamecock QB Connor Shaw is out for two weeks. He has a "sprained shoulder" (his throwing shoulder), the team will be relying on Dylan Thompson for awhile. Bryan's status: not optimistic.
3.  Eric Holder and the DOJ are going to sue North Carolina over their new Voter-ID laws. It astounds me how people let these guys make racist arguments for how Voter ID is discrimination. Bryan's status: Bryan's status: annoyed at the DOJ.
4. Government Shutdown Looms. Apparently, the folks running the government are having a little disagreement on something, and a government shutdown might occur. For those of you unfamiliar with a government shutdown of "non-essential" workers, it looks a lot like a weekend. Bryan's status: Whatever, bro.
5. Remember the "hockey stick" graph? Yeah, that was totally bogus. Bryan's Status: Shocked!*

*just kidding, not really shocked.

Insurers Required to Report on Climate Change

Minnesota has joined four other states in requiring its insurance companies to discuss how extensively they’ve prepared for climate change.

I'm not sure about which states make up the other four, but you would think that Minnesota would  be thinking "Let's get some global warming going on up in here! It's freezing!".

SC DNR Releases Global Warming Report

I GUESS THEY'RE NOT READING MY BLOG: Per the South Carolina Department of Natural Resources: "South Carolina should brace for the effects of global warming and begin planning for those changes."

You can read the full report from SC DNR here.

Global Warming Is Biggest April's Fools Joke Ever

It's been set up for many years. Everyone from Al Gore to Orlando Bloom have been involved. They were all saying that global warming is happening, and it's all due to the carbon-dioxide that man is putting into the atmosphere. Even some scientists got in on the gag and made some scary looking charts.

However, actual facts have been revealed today showing that the Earth's temperature has been flat for the last fifteen years.

OVER the past 15 years air temperatures at the Earth’s surface have been flat while greenhouse-gas emissions have continued to soar. The world added roughly 100 billion tonnes of carbon to the atmosphere between 2000 and 2010. That is about a quarter of all the CO₂ put there by humanity since 1750. And yet, as James Hansen, the head of NASA’s Goddard Institute for Space Studies, observes, “the five-year mean global temperature has been flat for a decade.”

April Fool's!

Wow, you scientists sure are a bunch of kidders. You rascals, you. Even "Climate Change" is wrong because the temperature has been flat. Nothing is changing. Ok, you guys...great joke.

Temperatures fluctuate over short periods, but this lack of new warming is a surprise. Ed Hawkins, of the University of Reading, in Britain, points out that surface temperatures since 2005 are already at the low end of the range of projections derived from 20 climate models (see chart 1). If they remain flat, they will fall outside the models’ range within a few years.

Just one follow-up question though? Was all the expensive regulation part of the April Fool's joke as well? No?

Well I guess the joke is on us.

USDA Advocates "Meatless Mondays"

Yesterday, the USDA released a newsletter encouraging agency employees not to eat meat on Mondays.

Pointing to the United Nations as their informational authority, the USDA’s newsletter said that going meatless is good for the environment because “animal agriculture is a major source of greenhouse gases and climate change.

Wait, what? Is global warming climate change now a primary focus of the USDA?

I thought the USDA was the government agency that was supposed to help farmers. This is the opposite. The USDA encouraging it's employees to avoid meat is like the DOT encouraging it's employees not to use bridges or tunnels.

Once again, this is your tax money at work. Whenever I hear a politician ask me for more tax money, it's always for police, firefighters, teachers, or roads. Whenever I hear about my tax money being actually spent, it's always on stuff like this.

Tree Rings and Climate Change

You know how the folks who keep pushing the global warming theory like to scream that "The science is settled! Stop being a denier!"? I think I figured out why they are saying that. They don't want anyone performing any scientific research that might prove them wrong. And that's understandable, no one wants to be proven wrong. 

Nevertheless, some brave scientists have continued to conduct studies and be all scientific and stuff. The nerve of those people.

The latest study of tree rings by some German scientists have revealed that it was warmer in Roman times than it is now, and the earth has been cooling for the last 2,000 years. It sounds like science itself is starting to be a science denier.

How did the Romans grow grapes in northern England? Perhaps because it was warmer than we thought. A study suggests the Britain of 2,000 years ago experienced a lengthy period of hotter summers than today. German researchers used data from tree rings – a key indicator of past climate – to claim the world has been on a ‘long-term cooling trend’ for two millennia until the global warming of the twentieth century. 

So over the last 2,000 years, the earth has generally cooled down. Excuse me if I don't go into a tizzy about the earth warming up a little over the last 50 years.

Frankly, it sounds like we were due for a little break from the cooling trend.

Save the Planet - Move to the South

From time to time, I have been accused of criticizing the idea of man-made (or anthropogenic) "global warming". Well sir, no more. I've read an article that has made me realize how much some of our brothers and sisters living in the Northeast are killing the planet for their lavish lifestyle. I'm fully on the global warming train, and I'm here to address a large factor in energy consumption in the United States.

As you may be aware, the more energy you use, the more the planet dies a little. As you can see from this chart below, one of the main sources of household energy consumption is space heating. (It's the sky-blue part of the bar at the bottom of each column.) Note how the energy used for heating in the Northeast is significantly higher than everything else. By comparison, heating is far and away more of an energy waster than air-conditioning in the South and the West.

So, if you live in the Northeast, you're really being a wasteful energy consumer. You're living in a cold place that you have to use a great deal of energy to heat, just so you can continue to live there without your little toesies getting frostbitten. I, as the new global warming sheriff am here to tell all y'all up North: It's time to move down to the South.

So if you want to help save the planet, move out of Vermont and get yourself to Alabama where people know how to live in harmony with Mother Gaia. Moving out of New England could be the purest form of environmental activism; your selfish, earth destroying choice of living in Massachusetts in killing us all. And as for Canada, Gaia’s message is clear: shut it down, now.

I guess that if you don't want to move, being a selfish person who cares only about living in Connecticut, we could come up with a cold-climate heat-waster surtax. As a citizen of the earth, I'm sure that you Yankees would be happy to pay it.

You do care about the earth, don't you?
[H/T Insty]

Global Warming Projections to be "Revisited"

Hey, breaking news! The guys who predicted global warming climate change got some things wrong. Apparently, the planet is a complicated thing, and it's tough to model it with your TI-82.

"Everyone seemed to think that August heat waves and drought would have major effects on grass productivity, but we couldn't find any," says Prof Joseph Craine of Kansas State uni, describing research on prairie grasslands carried out at the US National Science Foundation's Konza Prairie Long-Term Ecological Research (LTER) site - one of a network of US government monitoring stations used to assess climate effects.

According to new research published by Craine and his colleagues, both droughts and heat waves generally have much less effect on the mighty grasslands of America than previously thought. Heat waves in particular need to happen during a specific two-week period to have any real consequences for grass growth in a given year.

Yeah, so apparently, warmer weather doesn't just automatically kill all the grasses in Mid-West America. Why is this important to the computer models, you ask?

These results are significant as until now projections of the possible effects of predicted climate change have assumed that droughts and heat waves would always have an effect on ecosystems - and that in turn would lead on to carbon level changes leading to more temperature rises and so on. These assumptions may now have to be revisited.

Revisited, you say? You know, that's what I'm going to start saying when I get something totally wrong. "What's that? The Cubs didn't win the World Series last year as my computer model predicted? I guess I'll have to revisit some assumptions I made about Kerry Wood's arm.

Revisiting. It's the new: "Oops, we got that totally wrong."