Tuesday, April 10, 2012

NFL Teams and Their NCAA Equivalent

Shamelessly stolen and cherry-picked from EDSBS:
  1. Dallas Cowboys: We're really lucky they haven't won a title in decades, because their bandwagon fans are absolutely insufferable. Run by a fat guy in the late '00s, and it was really funny. Most like: University of Notre Dame.
  2. Washington Redskins: Great recruiters of talent who struggle with the concept of "winning football games." Offensive mascot. Most like: Clemson University
  3. Chicago Bears: They won one title in the '80s and never shut up about it. At least you can listen to some decent music when you visit their city. Former coach probably involved in a Ponzi scheme. Most like: University of Georgia.
  4. Detroit Lions: Bro QB. Never going to win a title, a fact fans are slowly coming around to. Most like: University of South Carolina.
  5. Minnesota Vikings: Has had an entertaining string of high-powered offenses, embarrassing coaches and conference title game losses. Most like: University of Arkansas
  6. New Orleans Saints: Mentally unstable Cajun fans with a coach who plays by his own rules. Most like: Louisiana State University
  7. New England Patriots: Locals were mostly unaware of the team's presence until the mid-'90s and often make questionable sartorial choices. Most like: University of Florida.
  8. Pittsburgh Steelers: If you meet one of their fans, you will probably hear about an inflated number of titles. Nobody who roots for the team has ever actually lived in Pittsburgh. Most like: University of Alabama.
  9. Baltimore Ravens: The little brother to the Pittsburgh Steelers. Fans have an odd affinity for Zubaz. Nobody would ever want to live in Baltimore. Most like: Auburn University.
  10. Cleveland Browns: Decades of grim, depressing incompetence. So bad that Tim Couch was the highlight of the team's existence. Most like: University of Kentucky
  11. Indianapolis Colts: Only relevant when a Manning is involved. The fanbase with the highest rate of adult-onset diabetes. Most like: Ole Miss
  12. Denver Broncos: Worships Peyton Manning, even though he never won a title for them. Lovers of orange and mountains. Irrelevant since 1998. Players manage to get into trouble in an otherwise dull city. Most like: University of Tennessee.

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